I pretty much just has a brain dump last night but I'll try to do my best to be concise this time around.
OP - Please break this down into paragraphs. Provide more facts, how much do you earn? According to the calculation worksheet says $4230 but this is incorrect I earn (gross before deductions, insurance, 401k etc) $3430 per my contract with my employer. I have that document handy.
how much does mom earn? According to the calculation worksheet $1858 but I have no way of proving/disproving that income. Last I knew she was in retail sales
What is the support order? Was $500 / month now $870 + $100 arrears
What does custody look like? Primary custody to Grandparents with final decision making. I have visitation any time I'd like but don't (too much drama) therefore I moved to North Carolina nearly 3 years ago. Mother has 3 to 4 weekends a month depending on how many weeks in the month
Why does your son live with his paternal grandparent? Long story had CPS involvement due to health concerns that biological mother was creating she was diagnosed with Munchausen by proxy which backfired on her and despite all the resource I could pull together I couldn't handle my Son's medical issues and my Daughter which was a small toddler at the time.
Are you paying support for your son? Yes, over 10 years to PACSES (PA's Support collection) my son is 16 been paying since separation at age 3 first to Mother than after the CPS incident to Grandparents.
Do I understand that you want Mom to reimburse you for your Daughter's braces with post-tax dollars, and then you pay the orthodontist through your HSA pre-tax dollars? The proposal was to use the HSA to pay the orthodontist directly with pre-tax dollars and not modify support.
The fact that your wife has medical issues is irrelevant. Your daughter and the obligation to support her comes first. Thank you I totally agree both children deserve equal support. I did acknowledge that my Wife is a side issue however, my own health does take some priority I am starting to have failing health myself overweight due to depression, high blood pressure, diabetes, my autism symptoms interfering more with day to day life. I am seeing a therapist, having my medications managed and participated in DBT through UNC Chapel Hill for a year before 'graduating'.
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Why were you being called a deadbeat dad? Are you? Not at all I've always paid support in full, and on-time, I do not have an issue paying support and recognize the importance. When I did not have a 2nd child up until 5 years ago (that I have custody of) and re-married it was difficult but budgeting for 3 including myself is a challenge living paycheck to paycheck now with this new order I'm going in the red already as they ran to my employer as fast as I can say the word and pulled the new amount despite being in dispute. I am likely going to have the Autism provider discontinue services for my Daughter because I am in a position where it isn't possible to afford that care on top of housing, electric, water, rent. The last conference in 2021 I used OBS and Active Presenter on my laptop and saved the entire conference offsite cloud storage location outside the United States obviously, I cannot do anything with it legally due to archaic laws in Pennsylvania, but I do have concrete proof of what was said & done but it's useless. I'm slating to cancel that account which will permanently delete my evidence shortly.
It kind of sounds like it, going by what you've written. Why don't you have custody of your son? Refer above but it was an agreement to satisfy CPS between Paternal grandparents (my mom/dad), Mother and Myself
Do you have visitation with him? It doesn't sound like your relationship with your mother, the boy's guardian, is very good and why is that? My relationship with my mother since placing me on support and using it as a 'carrot' to scare/intimidate me has driven me away hence why I moved away and any contact I restrict to e-mail.
If your wife is disabled, how can she be your representative in court filings that do not involve her? What's her disability and is it keeping her from working to provide for her daughter? My wife has Narcolepsy a sleep/wakefulness disorder the Movie Deuce Bigalow exaggerated the condition but imagine being up for several days & perpetually tired...Social Security Disability has classified her she is "unable to obtain, maintain substantial, gainful employment" according to their and her doctors. We work together to ensure our Daughter is taken care of and her needs are met. However, this new support order for my Son is jeopardizing my Daughter's need for financial support for her medical needs ie Autism services, extensive Dental work. diapers, etc.
Your autism is level 1 so it's not that debilitating. Plenty of people function quite well despite it. Why do you think you're being treated so unfairly by the courts? Level 1 is defined as needing supports and that is definitely me in situations such as court. They have failed to recognize despite ADA filings that I need help in this kind of stressful situation as well as their conduct escalated and caused multiple meltdowns one of which as I described put me in grave danger of losing my life having a meltdown on the shoulder of i80 during heavy traffics partly that's my fault I shouldn't of opened that piece of mail while driving but I digress. They have a duty to ensure I can participate safely inside and outside their facility instead they treated me as someone who is having a temper tantrum rather an emotional meltdown. My meltdowns get scary inside/outside my body/brain my Therapist best described it as "Lizard brain" like I said in my initial post I was not under any type of logical control and outside the safety of my car on a busy highway and in no way realizing my surroundings were extremely dangerous if myself or another driver going 70mph crossed paths. Domestic Relations can't have a payer of any amount of Child Support if I'm dead because of my inability to recognize the surroundings or another driver hit me point blank.
